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Voyeurism Sex Therapy


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“All the world’s a stage” (Shakespeare’s As You Like It), on which some of us love to play, and some of us prefer to watch. The players tend to get the glory, but without an audience there’s not much of a show.

Let’s face it: lots of us like to watch. We’re not talking Shakespeare here, though that can be erotic as well… we’re talking about sex. We’re talking about the thrill of watching another’s most intimate activities, getting turned on by seeing someone else get turned on.

Would you say this is you? If so, you might be a voyeur. Everyone’s a little bit of one, at least. We can all get turned on by the sight of something or someone really sexy.  But some of us are more voyeuristic than others.  Some of us like to cultivate our voyeuristic tendencies like wine connoisseurs cultivate their palettes, tasting different vintages.  Perhaps you like to look through the silver screen into erotic worlds you’ve never seen. Maybe it’s a film or a digital stream on your computer or phone. Porn, after all, is the most common kind of erotic voyeurism going on in the modern world. And despite its popular explosion in the early 21st Century, visual erotica has been with us since humanity first started cave painting.

Then again, maybe you like to see it live, perhaps in a strip club, or fantasize about the quintessential live sex performance, with you sitting back like a sultan with your harem of exhibitionistic sex performance artists titillating your fancy in every way imaginable to delight your eyes and ears.  Then again, maybe your favorite type of voyeurism is a bit more secretive. Do you like to sneak a peak through a keyhole, a hole in a shower wall or up through the floorboards of an old porch, like a child discovering something naughty?  Do you like to look through your neighbor’s window, catching them in an intimate moment: a couple arguing and then making passionate love, a he-man flexing his naked muscles in his home gym, a beautiful woman undressing alone in her bathroom, stepping into the Jacuzzi, spreading her legs and masturbating to an aquatic orgasm on one of the ferociously whirling jets?  Or do you like to combine exhibitionism and voyeurism, and just watch yourself in the mirror?

What does it mean to be seen?  To be seen is to be a star.  A sex symbol–immortal, if only for a moment.  So what about seeing?  To see is to glimpse a special secret, to go behind the curtain, to gain knowledge. Knowledge is power, and sexual knowledge is sexual power.  No wonder you feel so excited and even powerful when you see someone or something special in a sexual way.  No wonder we all can appreciate the erotic pleasures of voyeurism.

The passive delights of voyeurism are especially popular among the rich and powerful. Pope Alexander IX was one of history’s most decadent voyeurs.  That’s right, a Catholic pope was openly enjoying banquets such as what follows, as described by his master of ceremonies Burchard, Bishop of Ostia: “Fifty reputable courtesans supped at the Vatican…and after supper they danced about with the servants and others in that place, first in their clothes and then nude…candelabras and lighted candles were set on the floor and chestnuts were strewn about and the naked courtesans on hands and feet gathered them up, wriggling in and out among the candelabras…Then all those present in the hall were carnally treated in public… The pope gave prizes to the men who copulated the most times with the courtesans.”  Pope Alexander IX of the notorious Borgia family ruled the Catholic faithful from 1492 until his death in 1503 and was known for his libertine pleasures as well as for his relatively benign treatment of Jews, slaves and others.  Possibly all that voyeuristic entertainment helped to make him more “Catholic,” at least in the liberal, compassionate sense of the word. Other famous voyeurs from the annals of history include Lord Byron, Casanova, Charlie Chaplin, King Farouk, Errol Flynn, Maxim Gorki, Victor Hugo, Martin Luther and the notorious Marquis de Sade.


Some call voyeurs “Peeping Toms,” stemming from the medieval story of Lady Godiva—obviously an aristocratic exhibitionist—who rode through town naked to protest her husband Lord Godiva’s unfair taxing of the townspeople (a bleeding heart liberal show-off if ever there was one). All the townspeople were supposed to close their shutters and not look upon the naked Lady on her horse. But one naughty, rather horny young man named Tom couldn’t resist taking a peep (can you blame him?), so that’s where we get the term “Peeping Tom.”

Though the word “voyeur” comes from the French, voir, “to see”, let’s not forget it really encompasses more than just the eyes. Sound is a big part of the pleasure of sensual observation.  Ever find yourself overhearing the muffled moans of a housemate or neighbor banging away across the hall? Maybe you put your ear up to the door for more? Perhaps you’ve passed by an open window and had to stop yourself, listening to the excited breathing, a headboard hitting the wall, heightened voices… coming from just beyond. Did it turn you on? How could it not? Feelings are contagious, after all, and sound transports feelings, especially if the sound is someone sighing or crying out in ecstasy.

Speaking of feelings, do you need to talk about your voyeuristic desires, experiences or fantasies?  Are your voyeuristic feelings getting you into trouble—or on the verge of trouble?  Are you watching “too much” porn—maybe to the point that you feel (or someone you love feels) you are “addicted”?  Are you spending so much time watching that you have no time or energy to actually do anything with your sex life?  Would you sometimes rather just watch porn than have sex with your lover, even if she’s right in your bed waiting for you?  Are you looking at stuff that’s illegal?  Are you spying on someone without their consent?  Do you find yourself going to strip clubs instead of doing the hard work of playing the dating game?  Are you spending all your money on erotic entertainers who dominate you, turning you into a helpless “money slave” to their demands?  Are they humiliating you, cuckolding you and taking advantage of your voyeuristic needs?  Has your voyeurism morphed into cheating?  Are you doing things that make you feel ashamed and guilty afterwards?  Are your natural voyeuristic desires spiraling out of control?

If the answer is yes to any of these questions, you would greatly benefit by talking with someone who understands your desires and can help you regain control and keep them from ruining your life—without being forced to “abstain” or give up the natural, positive pleasures of voyeurism.  This is a specialty of ours here at the Dr. Susan Block Institute.  Many “regular” sex therapists aren’t comfortable addressing these topics, or perhaps you don’t feel comfortable talking to a regular therapist about your most personal feelings.  Whatever your concerns, rest assured, you can talk to us. World-renowned sexologist Dr. Susan Block, a Yale graduate with two doctorates, and the therapists of the Institute, are all excellent in their various fields, utilizing telephone sex therapy to listen, talk to you and help you deal with all your voyeuristic pleasures, problems, questions and desires.  You can talk to us about anything, and usually we can help, as we have helped people all over the world for over two decades.

And yes, you can masturbate, if you like, during sessions.  And, no, there is no other sex therapy or phone sex service quite like ours.  Our form of sex therapy is unique in that we can discuss and help you with your real-life situations, and/or we can enter the Erotic Theater of the Mind (your mind or ours or a combination) and roleplay your voyeuristic fantasies—even the forbidden kind that would get you into serious trouble if you acted them out in real life.  In fact, one of our specialties is “the forbidden,” the stuff you can’t talk about to anyone else.  After all, pretty much everything is safe on the phone—where you can close your eyes and fantasize the wildest scenes possible through the hidden camera of your imagination. Moreover, rest assured that your secrets are safe with us.  Therapy with the Institute is completely private, discreet and confidential.  Of course, we can’t tell you their names, but we count many celebrities and world leaders among our clients, so we understand the importance of strict confidentiality.  We have been around and we intend to stay around, and we value your privacy as we value our reputation.

Voyeuristic phone sex therapy is fun, satisfying, edifying, defuses desires (so you’re less likely to get into trouble) and often leads to great insights into your sexuality and other aspects of your deeper self.  We’ve found the phone—private, intimate and essentially non-visual—to be an excellent vehicle for this kind of erotic insight.  Then again, voyeurism is primarily a visual interest, and you can also enjoy a very personal voyeuristic experience tailored to your desires with one of our webcam sex therapists.

Whatever your voyeuristic pleasure or problem, we’re here for you, 24/7, every day and night, including holidays, whether you need to talk…or just watch.  Give us a call anytime at 213.291.9497.

Striptease Therapy


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Are you turned on by a good striptease?  Do you love the seductive style of a sensuous exotic dancer?  Do you get a voyeuristic thrill from the bawdy bounce of burlesque?  Do you crave the devastating tease and denialof the skilled ecdysiast? Or do you go for the “amateur,” the sexy girl on the dance floor who lets the music flow through her body like a shimmering stream of pure rhythm?

Do you like to watch your lover dance for you just before you make love?  Or do you prefer to gaze upon a stranger, a hot, untouchable, superstar stripper high up above you on the strip club stage?  Do supple pole dancers drive you crazy? Are you a helpless fan of the femme fatale? A sucker for a supple lapdance?

Have you ever watched a sexy dancer—on the stage, at a club or in your dreams—wishing you could get to know her better?  Do you fantasize about getting her alone and having her deliver on what her dance seems to promise you? Do you imagine her dancing all over you, stripping off your clothes along with hers, then rhythmically riding you into a series of orgasms that has both of you screaming with deep wild pleasure and harmonious erotic energy?


Or do you worry that you (or a loved one) might be “addicted” to strippers?  Are you hanging out in strip clubs whenever you can, cheating on your partner or missing work, sticking all your hard-earned cash in those irresistible little G-strings or just giving the stripper of your dreams money shower after shower, until your wallet is empty and dry?

Or perhaps you prefer doing the striptease to watching it.  Are you a secret exhibitionist who longs to strip upon a stage, to reveal what you so often conceal?   Would you like to be an exotic dancer—professionally or just for fun?  Do you need advice about the “business” or encouragement to strip for personal, private pleasure?  Are you having trouble handling your desires for exhibitionism?  Are you a stripper that wants to transition into a different kind of life?

Do you need to talk about it? 

You can talk to us.  Call the Dr. Susan Block Institute now or anytime, 24/7,  for Striptease Therapy. What exactly is  “Striptease Therapy”?  It can take a variety of forms, depending on you and your needs.  Whether you need help disciplining your out-of-control stripper fetish, getting up the courage to do a seductive striptease for your husband (or wife), or roleplaying an exotic dancer domination fantasy, give us a call at 213.291.9497.

Dancing is the world’s oldest art form. People have been dancing since shortly after they started walking, and some of the first dances they did were erotic dances, also known as “fertility dances.” Essentially, these were dances to make the crops grow along with the men’s erections, dances to make the rain fall as the women got wet.  Some say that any kind of dance is erotic.  George Bernard Shaw famously called dancing “a vertical expression of a horizontal desire.”

Stripping is also very old.  Probably as soon as people started wearing clothes, some people started taking their clothes off in a sexy, seductive way.  Keep in mind that for many thousands of years, we humans were as naked as all the other animals in the forest.  As we started to wear clothing, human nudity became taboo.  Unclothing—or stripping—became theteasing “gateway” between the acceptable, civilized, clothed world and the realm of forbidden, primal nudity.

Thus stripping is one of the most basic, powerful aphrodisiacs there is. The gradual, sensuous removal of articles of clothing reveals the natural mysteries of the human body in a viscerally exciting way that takes us from our cultured world of clothing to a naked realm of primeval pleasures and our deep evolutionary origins.  A well-known University of Chicago Sex Survey found that the second most common turn-on, next to regular sexual intercourse, is watching someone sexy taking off their clothes

Slowly…as one of the greatest American strippers, Gypsy Rose Lee said, “Anything worth doing is worth doing slowly” (though, if you’re in a hurry, a quick strip can also hit the spot!)….

Speaking of Gypsy, in response to her request for a “more dignified” way to refer to her profession than “stripper,” H. L. Mencken is credited with coining the word “ecdysiast” – from “ecdysis”, meaning “to molt.”

Striptease in mythology goes at least as far back as the ancient Sumerian story of the descent of the goddess Inanna into the Underworld where, at each of the seven gates, she removes an article of clothing until her naked arrival in hell. Inanna’s cosmic striptease is carried on in the Dance of the Seven Veils of Salome, who danced for King Herod in the New Testament (Matthew 14:6 and Mark 6:21-22). Though the Bible records Salome’s dance, the first mention of her actually removing seven veils occurs in Oscar Wilde‘s play Salome in 1893 and Richard Strauss‘s operatic version in 1905, which some claim as the origin of modern striptease.

In the Gay Nineties, striptease and burlesque flourished in Paris at the Moulin Rouge and Folies Bergère, and in 1905, the notorious and tragic Dutch dancer, Mata Hari, later shot as a spy by the French authorities during World War I, was an overnight striptease success at the Musée Guimet. In the 1920s, an American in Paris, Josephine Baker, stripped to nothing but a “skirt” of bananas in her sensational danse sauvage.

The 1960s saw a revival of striptease in the form of topless go-go dancing. This eventually merged with the older tradition of burlesque to create modern stripping. Carol Doda of the Condor Night Club in San Francisco is given the credit of being the first topless—then bottomlessgo-go dancer.  In the past, the performance often finished as soon as the undressing was over, but today’s strippers usually continue dancing, pole-dancing and lapdancing in the nude.

Meanwhile, burlesque or “neo-burlesque” has branched off from stripping into a separate, somewhat more “dignified” and more humor-infused dance form, maintaining the old striptease traditions with new twists.  Then there are the modern temple dancers who perform “striptease therapy” in the sacred traditions of Aphrodite and ApsaraSo many ways to strip and tease!

One of the most famous striptease artists of modern times, Dita Von Teese, has appeared twice on The Dr. Susan Block Show, including once when Dr. Block interviewed Bettie Page, the late legendary American striptease, pin-up and fetish model, in 1996.

Dr. Block also wrote the definition of STRIPTEASE for the new Wiley-Blackwell International Encyclopedia of Human Sexuality.

But back to you…and your stripper fetish

Do you need to talk with someone who’s been on both sides of the lapdance?  For serious sex therapy or a pleasureable phone experience or help with your—or your loved one’s—stripper habit, give us a call right now or anytime you need to talk.  Call 213.291.9497.  We’re here for you.

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